i saw rocks
standing tall, firm, and still
stained with a desert red
and faded sun marks

line gradients so perfectly adorned by purple clouds and pink skies
i sat on a rock and experienced unknown silences
i was alone in my breaths
i heard my heartbeat
along with the buzzing of insects, enjoying their open habitat
the silence was remarkable
new, undisturbed, untainted

subtle gradients of light blue, grey, and red
so flawless on an evening drive
nothing but serene minutes spent on a road alone
cruising with no map
no real destination

06-2014

Twenty-two

The combination of two and two
Leaving me feeling bland and used
Twenty-one and its glamour is fading
I carry a serious face
Tense and itching to be flipped
Some new feeling to arise
To rise in me, a sense of newfound curiosity
Where all I want to do is learn and be inspired
It's not like it was when I was seventeen
Things weren't complex
I was naive
Now I may know too much

05-2014

a place governs my feelings
as much as i don't want it to
or give it that type of power
where i am or where i'm placed in is never a thought overlooked.
i can choose and debate
where is the best to peacefully reside
but i know for sure i gotta be right within
and who knows how long that might take
to achieve that moment of clarity
personal growth has no status quo
i gotta learn to be flexible

05-2014

cat and mouse

People who talk too much
People who don't talk enough
Who's carrying the bigger bluff?

Silences mistaken all too often
For something wrong within not without
My observations move in me a feeling of defeat and sadness

Circling thoughts leave me drowsy and dizzy
Seeing this all as a game of cat and mouse

04-2014

why do i lie my head on a pillow of unfulfilled dreams?
where my head doesn't rest
where my body remains anxious
trying to sleep in a rested state
but can't seem to get over that hurdle

is that what evil is?
is that what pain is?

04-2014

ignorance is not bliss

why are people remedying things they simply don't have any knowledge in
with the statement: ignorance is bliss?
how defeated does one have to be to say that?
why was that saying ever a thing to be said?
it should be illegal.
it should be frowned upon.
it should be investigated upon.
along with the statement:  boys will be boys.
i refuse to be passive and let the actions of men, be it rendered as inappropriate, rule the way women behave amongst them.
i'm not gonna buy that bullshit.

04-2014

restlessness

i woke up a bit past 12
i couldn't sleep in peace
pillows not providing much comfort
old pains and strains that keep lingering within
this is my day off

04-2014

hurt

There's a lot of hurt in this world
I wish it wasn't a fact
I wish I could do all I could to remedy it
I almost feel as if it's my moral responsibility to care
Why wouldn't I?
I have a heart that feels and understands human conditions

I just wish I was capable to do more
That shouldn't keep me from smiling 
Or pushing on encouragement
I doubt myself
That I don't have enough strength
That my words aren't sufficient
Because I haven't experienced heartbreak or loss or romantic issues

I may not know what that is
But I know that how a person loves romantically doesn't make or break a person's heart
A lot goes unsaid, unheard
All hard to translate
All hard to gauge
All not meant to decipher
I almost believe half the battle is separating both heart and mind, completely and willfully.

When that's possible and doable,
Maybe it's easier
Maybe it's not
I gotta find out
I gotta figure it out

04-2014

i inch closer to the music and bright lights
where feelings are surfaced and the head is on hold
where i'm so happy and carefree
i don't think about anything
other than the pleasant vibrations
my ear drums are experiencing
traveling in and around my body

04-2014

my tongue wrestles with your tongue
exploring unknown pleasures with my steady muscles
my lips purse with yours
which send chills and arousal all over my body

you work your way down
and i'm dying to cave in as you tactfully tease me
i want you
i want you inside

you hit all the spots like shooting darts at a bullseye
i don't want you to stop
you heed my plea to continue
i reach ultimate satisfaction

whoa

04-2014

I don't need to answer.
I don't owe you an answer.

I don't need to send you anything.

Since I'm the one always initiating, I'm not going to.

I'm spent. 

Tried and nothing left to give anymore.

Too many times have I been extremely generous and nice.

Too eager to be in close proximity with people I deemed interesting and cool.

Been ripped to shreds, abused, beat up, worn out, chewed up, and spit out.

Begged to assist, I caved in and reimbursed with nothing.

I only wanted something simple.

Some company, somebody to ask me how I was doing and be heard.

Somebody to know why I am and why I see what I see.

Do people really want to pick at my brain?

Probably not.

If they did, they would've tried harder and actually listened to all I had to say.

04-2013